01 November 2012

Bad Mother

Lola’s room is a small one and there really isn’t enough room for everything we put in there. She is usually very good about keeping her room tidy but once friends come over to play and everything gets pulled out from the shelves, it’s hard to get it all under control again. It is simply too much for her and things steadily get worse.

Several attempts have been made to organize her room. Once she and I started that task together and I asked her to go through the great big basket with stuffed animals and get rid of the ones she doesn’t play with. Naturally, every single stuffed toy suddenly became a favorite. Watching Lola go through her collection deciding which one to do away with was like watching “Sophie’s Choice.” Gut wrenching.

About two weeks ago, Ryan and Lola went on their customary father - daughter date and I seized the opportunity to take charge of her room. Hardening my heart, I was resolved to recycle a few more toys than the childhood toys of her parents which were the only ones she had been willing to give up. Ruthlessly I went through her basket and the shelves of her room. Three garbage bags later I resurfaced.

We put up more shelves, organized everything in shiny new purple baskets, and rearranged the furniture. You can actually see the floor of her room again. I also went through all of her drawers and purged her summer clothes and the outfits she had outgrown. Walking into her room now is like a breath of fresh air. Lola loves it and has not once asked for any of the toys I got rid of.

Until last night.

Ryan has gone bow hunting with his dad and as always when he is gone, the girls have a Girls Night. This means that Lola moves into my bedroom and we watch a movie together before we go to sleep. Since I have a bigger bed, there is more room for her stuffed friends, and she usually brings a few more than the two or three that share her bed.

“Mom,” I heard her say when she was getting ready for bed. “Have you seen that white bear that I have?”

I knew exactly which bear she meant. It had not made the cut. Not wanting to confess to that right away, I pretended not to know which bear she was talking about. She showed me a three inch version of the bear I had thrown away and told me she was looking for its mother.

Oh no. I had orphaned a baby bear.

I fessed up to possibly, maybe giving its mother away (not true, I threw it away) and suggested Lola could be the little bear’s mom from now on. Big tears rolled from Lola’s eyes as she hiccupped that the little bear could not sleep without its mother. My daughter is very good when it comes to drama. I felt horrible.

So, anyone have a white bear to spare? I know a good home for it.


  1. what a sweet post! I've been there dear mama! Hmmm...could the white bear have gone on an "adventure" of some kind??!!

  2. How could you :-)

  3. Uh oh! Boy, they can rip our hearts out! Have fun bear shopping:)lol

  4. Oh, I hate it when I make that mistake. I wish I had a white bear for ya.

    Happy Saturday Sharefest!

  5. {Melinda} Oh boy. I've been there. Usually my kiddos never asked for the stuffed animals and toys that they just couldn't part with (but I could part with and did). But every once in a while, I'd be caught. And feel horrible.

    BUT ... if some of those toys did not find another home, we would all currently be living in the garage. :)

  6. My little one is not even two yet but I have to make sure to go through his toys when he is not around. Otherwise, he begins to play with toys he hasn’t played with in months and then I feel guilty putting them up. I’m not sure what I am going to do when he gets older!

    I wish I had a white bear for you but I’m sure after a fews days Lola will move onto another stuffed animal :) . As she gets older I’m sure it will also get easier to go through her things with her and decide which ones to keep or give away.

    Visiting from SITS :)

  7. Aw, those tender moments. Sorry. I hope you both heal quickly.

    Happy Sharefest. I hope you have a great weekend. And that she moves on so you can have peace.

  8. Oh, no! I spent an entire day a few weeks back cleaning my son's room while he was at school. Folding clothes, organizing LEGOS, tossing broken toys. I was so excited to show him when he returned home from school. When he saw his room he abruptly burst into tears. Never again.


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